Worth it
by jonas.cullen.x3
Summary: After everything The Jonas Brothers have done to Miley, how does she feel? was a oneshot, now a multichapter. :D
1. The beginning

**This is legal, I have no idea if any of the events in this one shot are true, this is just how I think Miley feels at the moment.**

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I was there when everything took off for them, everything. We were the best of friends, Nick was my rock, Joe was there for a laugh, and Kevin, he was my shoulder to cry on. When things were hard to go through, Nick was there to whisper comforting words, Joe was there to make me laugh, and Kevin let me sit there and cry, telling me I was strong.

The day I realized I was diagnosed with Hypoglycemia, was all because of Nick. He made sure I checked my blood sugar which wasn't normal, everyday after that, he watched after me carefully, though he thought I didn't notice.

The day the vanity fair photos were leaked, Joe defended me. Stating that, "We're good friends of hers, and we got her back and we love her to death."

Kevin, wow, Kevin was there when the youngest of the brothers broke my heart. December 28, 2007, I will never forget that day. We were going on separate tours, it was going to be difficult to manage a relationship. Still, Kevin stayed on the phone with me till the odd hours of the night, reassuring me that Nick still loved me.

After that things started to fall apart. They hardly called, text back, even ignored my emails. I guess it was to be expected, good things come to an end eventually right? Still, I acknowledged their birthdays, told them congratulations on their accomplishments, and even told them when I heard their new songs or saw their music videos. What do I get in return?

_Nothing._

Not even a, "sorry about the photo leak, Miley." If they only knew how tore up I was, if they only knew the pain I felt inside, but of course not, they were too engulfed in their crazy life. If it wasn't a photoshoot, it was a premier, or a cd signing, or a concert, _something. _My life, was slowly going down hill. So I wrote songs, I wrote down all my feelings.

7 things- obviously, the seven things I loved about nick, the seven things I hated, Thinking about our relationship, wishing he'd say sorry, just…missing him.

Driveway-I really don't know, I guess it's what my relationship with the Jonas Brothers was really about after the breakup. Trying to fix something, not succeeding, loosing them when they were already gone. It hurts.

Full Circle- I come full circle with Nick, we're back and forth, were on and off, full circle.

Fly on the wall- Paparazzi, of course, trying to involve their selves in my relationship with Nicholas, posting 'racy pictures' of me all over the web. How they wish they could know every detail of my life.

Bottom of the ocean- How I lost nick, how now he's just like everything that can't be found. How I want him to be happy, even if it causes me pain.

Goodbye- How the breakup went, and how I wish it would reunite. Something that won't happen that's for sure. I haven't heard _When you look me in the eyes _play through my phones speakers in almost a year.

A music video was made for _7 things, _which I doubt nick has seen, but I'm hoping. I hope he realizes the agony I've been through this past year. But of course not, it's Nick Jonas were talking about.

I suppose I deserve the _TEAM DEMI AND SELENA _shirt Kevin wore, though I think I deserve it, it still hurts. I cried on while talking on the phone with Mandy for hours. I never imagined he could be so…so cruel.

The shirt brought my attention to other things, Nelena. I was shocked at first to hear that they were dating, then I was hurt, angry, and finally depressed, depressed that he had attempted to move on and all I've done is sit here and wallow in self pity. Which is why I started being spotted with random guys.

_Cody Linely_

_Lucas Till_

_Justin Gaston_

I wanted Nick to feel some pain, to hurt like I did, to….to…..to feel helpless and useless like I did. Pathetic, right? I bet he didn't even feel a second of

**Numbness.**

While I felt 11 months of it. I bet he didn't shed a

_Tear._

While hundreds stained my pillow.

He's happy though, I know he is,. So why can't I be happy?

Maybe it's because on my 16th birthday, they didn't acknowledge me. No, "Happy sweet 16 miley." or "Happy Birthday." not even a Hello. I know they noticed I was hurt though, I _cried _backstage before they went on. They stood there and watched me. It's not my fault Taylor wouldn't let me go before I broke down from seeing them. Joe didn't smile throughout the performance, Nick didn't sing his best, and Kevin wasn't his normal banging head playing self. They know it's their fault why I'm like this, they have to.

Or maybe it's because at the Concert for hope, they kept a distance from me, Nick, being farthest. At least Joe, _tried, _to be the bigger man and actually hugged me. Awkward glances were exchanged between Nick and I. Luckily, Mandy was waiting at the edge of the stage to run me to a bathroom before I burst into tears.

But I think the real reason I can't be happy, is because I'm not apart of the family that once loved me. They've moved on to

_Better people._

They're happy. I'm not.

I wouldn't change a thing that has happened in the past year, though. Just because they seem happy.

But no matter what, if any one had to of hurt me…..I'm glad it was them.

**Everyone **is going to hurt you. It's up to _you _to choose who is _**worth**_ it.


	2. The call

**I have to say, I'm actually shocked some people wanted me to turn it into a story.**

**So here it goesss!:]**

**From now on I'm not going to use last names, but if I slip, I'm sorry**

**Plus you guys know who those three gorgeous guys are, don't you?**

**;]**

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_Worth it._

_Worth it…_

_They're worth it._

I kept running those words through my head. Even though I believed they were worth it, the hole in my chest grew bigger each day. No calls, no text messages, no emails, no letters, nothing. It's been 11 months 2 weeks and three days now, this was getting ridiculous. Here they are, suppose to be my best friends. But so what, that doesn't matter to them, they have two replacements, they don't need me. I need them though, I need them so bad….it hurts. Selena doesn't love him, she never will, not like I did at least.

I sighed and wiped away my tears, it was time to be strong…..and check up on them. I grabbed my phone and dialed the familiar number. My finger hovered over the call button, but I couldn't bring myself to press it. I considered the possibilities.

a) they could laugh and hang up on me.

b) they could yell and hang up on me

c) they make small talk, say final goodbyes.

d) We say sorry, everything gets fixed.

I quickly marked off D, of course that wasn't going to happen. They don't care about me, they broke their promises, of course they don't care about me. I figured a or b would happen, which scared me enough to clear the number. Groaning I opened up my laptop and went to you tube. At least I could see how they were performing. I searched 'Jonas Brothers 77 kids concert.' That was their most recent performance that I could remember. I scrolled down and a video that caught my eye. 'Still in love with you- you're my destiny?' Clicking play I listened to their voices, which still had the power to completely amaze me. It was around the bridge I opened my eyes to look at _him._

"_I don't know what's worse baby, _

_Seeing you with him or being alone_

_On my own._

_No he doesn't love you baby, not_

_Like I did oh what's the point_

_You're my destiny, anyway."_

WHAT?! I stared at the screen with my eyes wide open. Those were the original lyrics, and since _he _said anyway at the end, those three words weren't sung on purpose. Nick slipped, he wasn't paying attention to what he was singing. I shut the laptop and pushed it to the side. Feeling like I needed to talk to someone, I snatched my phone from night stand. I dialed a number, not caring whose and pressed send. Whoever I had called answered on the sixth ring.

"Hello?" his voice sounded tired. Obviously, he hadn't looked at the caller id, which would explain why he answered. I could feel my body stiffen.

"Hello?," he repeated, annoyance leaked from his voice, like the tears were leaking from my eyes.

I opened my mouth to speak, "um….h-hi….it's Miles…I mean Miley," I knew my voice sounded small and weak, but I couldn't help it.

"oh," I could hear Kevin's breathing, "why are you calling?"

"I needed someone to talk to," I admitted, shamefully.

"Why call me? After everything you've put Nick through," I couldn't find my voice to tell him what Nick's put _me_ through.

"I-I don't know," I whispered.

"Look, I've got to go," He said, his voice cold, "Hope you have a nice day, _Miley."_

He spat my name as if it were a disease. The dial tone filled my ears. I pressed end and threw myself onto my bed.

_They're worth it._

_They're worth it._

Those were my last thoughts before I drifted off into a peaceful sleep, something I never wanted to wake up from.

**Whoa, sorry it's short, I just had to get this part out.**

**:DKevin is a wee bit heartless, huh?**

**I guess we have to understand he is Nick's brother.**

**Ugh.**

**:Dwell I feel bad since this was so short so, I've giving you a sneak peak at the next chapter! Which will be posted tomorrow or today depending on how many reviews there are.**

My phone lit up the dark room, I reluctantly got up and grabbed the iphone from my bed.

_One new text message._

I figured it was from Mandy or Justin, maybe even Demi. Opening the text message, I read it carefully

_Hey, I think we need to discuss something._

I looked below to see who it was from, that was when my heart stopped, the room started spinning, and the phone fell out of my hands crashing to the floor.


	3. The breakdown

**hanks for all the reviews guys! **

**:']**

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**Worth it.**

**I** woke up sometime during the night, two maybe three in the morning. Spit had dried on the side of my face and my hair was a tangled mess. Slowly I got up and stretched every muscle I could. I yawned and walked to my bathroom. I washed the drool from my cheek and brushed my hair out. After splashing cold water onto my face, I pulled my hair up into a ponytail. Something in the corner of the mirror caught my eye. I pulled the picture from the frame and stared at it. It was a picture of me with _them. _We were all gathered around a bonfire laughing and having a good time, that was the day before my world came crashing down. Feeling frustrated with myself I slammed the picture face down and ran out to my balcony, so many memories were held here, but only one of them mattered to me.

__

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

That's what I woke up to, I rubbed my eyes and looked out the glass window. Slipping out of bed, I opened the door.

"NICK! What are you doing here?" I whispered as I stepped out into the wintery night.

"I had to see you," he said and pulled me into a hug. My heart started racing and I sighed.

"Couldn't you have waited until tomorrow," I muttered into his chest.

"No," he breathed, "Now before I chicken out, Miley I like you, a lot, possibly even love! The first day I met you, I knew you were the one I wanted, no, the one I needed. Your smile makes my knees weak, when you cry, I feel like I need to protect you. I wake up everyday cause I know I get to see that gorgeous face of yours. Would you please be mine?" He spoke so fast, it took a minute for what he said to register.

"YES! I mean sure," I smiled and looked at him. He leaned down and kissed me softly on the lips.

I felt tears stream down my face. What did I do to deserve this?! All I ever did was, love him! He betrays me, says he loves me and betrays me. I angrily wiped the tears from my face and collapsed onto a chair. Well, if he doesn't need me I sure don't need him. _Is that the truth? _I asked myself. No, of course it wasn't the truth, I needed Nicholas more than anything. I needed to feel his arms around me, to hear him say he loves me, I needed him. The hole in my chest suddenly grew bigger as I remembered what happened yesterday. I just called him and he treats me like…like I'm nothing, like I'm not worth anything.

Suddenly, I realized how cold it was, the wind was stabbing my skin. I shivered and went inside. Putting on a coat, I turned on the radio so low it was just background music.

Suddenly, Incomplete came on. **(LISTEN TO IT! And the parts that I've written, listen and think about how miley feels then keep reading :])**

__

"Empty spaces fill me up with holes  
Distant faces with no place left to go  
Without you within me I can't find no rest  
Where I'm going is anybody's guess

I tried to go on like I never knew you  
I'm awake but my world is half asleep  
I pray for this heart to be unbroken  
But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete"

The tears came quicker than I thought they would. Suddenly I was on my knees sobbing. My heart ached, I felt hollow, I felt…incomplete. I needed an escape, I needed something to make me happy. I wanted to stop faking smiles, I wanted _them. _I don't care what they put me through, I needed them in my life again. I needed them soon, I was hurting, it was way past agony, agony would feel like a blessing compared to this. Why did he have to hurt me? What did I do to deserve this? _Stay strong miley._ THAT'S WHAT HE TELLS ME! Like I can stay strong when I'm falling apart every second, it's all his fault I'm like this. It's all his, so why do I feel like I need him. If he's caused me so much pain that it hurts to _breathe, _why do I still love him.

I pulled myself together and sat in a chair. I felt tired, dead tired, even though I sleep about nine hours. Heartbreak takes a lot of things from you, sleep included. You stay up half the night thinking of them.

Suddenly, My phone lit up the dark room, I reluctantly got up and grabbed the iphone from my bed.

__

One new text message.

I figured it was from Mandy or Justin, maybe even Demi. Opening the text message, I read it carefully

__

Hey, I think we need to discuss something.

I looked below to see who it was from, that was when my heart stopped, the room started spinning, and the phone fell out of my hands crashing to the floor.

__

"But without you all I'm going to be is, Incomplete."

**Aren't I so nice, I didn't even tell you who it was.**

**:]**

**Don't worry the next chapter will be posted as soon as THREE people review this.**


	4. The text message

**Alright, I promised :]**

**Anddd, I know this isn't my best,**

**YAY! This chapter is a little happier. :]**

**-----------------------------**

**Worth it.**

_Hey, I think we need to discuss something._

I looked below to see who it was from, that was when my heart stopped, the room started spinning, and the phone fell out of my hands crashing to the floor.

"_But without you all I'm going to be is, Incomplete."_

_------------------------------------------------------_

I stared at my phone, afraid to touch it. Why was _he _contacting me? I thought that he hated me, he made it clear on the phone yesterday. I slowly sunk to my knees, still in shock. _Snap out of it, Miley. _I slowly recovered from my state of shock and grabbed the phone. With shaking hands I replied,

_To: Kevin J._

_Okay, um what did you want to discuss?_

I read it over about thirty times before I sent it. I pinched myself, was I dreaming? No, this wasn't a dream. My dreams are normally peaceful, this most certainly isn't. I could feel tears leak through my eyes, why do I let these boys keep hurting me? My phone lit up again and I quickly got into a more comfortable position and read it.

_From: Kevin J._

_I just wanted to say, I'm terribly sorry Miles, you never deserved_

_ANY of the things we put on you. _

I could feel my body slowly losing energy as I broke down again. So they did know the pain they caused me and It took them 11 months to apologize. Still slightly upset, I pressed reply.

_To: Kevin J._

_Why? Why did you guys do this to me?_

I knew I probably shouldn't ask when I had a chance to regain a brother back, but I had to. I wanted to know their reason for putting me through hell. I pressed send and stared at my phone, waiting for it to light up again. They've let me down, they've left me alone, they've caused me so much misery. Was I really ready to accept them back? The hole in my chest told me, yes. Which is why when I got a text back, I smiled. For the first time in forever, I smiled. It wasn't a full smile, but enough to patch up a smile portion of my heart.

_To: Kevin J._

_Honestly, I don't know. But I've never stopped caring for you._

_I know I've done things to make you think otherwise,_

_But I never stopped, Miley._

_None of us did._

I knew the last part was a lie, Nicholas did. I bit my lip and pressed reply.

_To: Kevin J._

_I never stopped either._

_Where does this leave us Kevin?_

_Are we friends?_

I pressed send as soon as I finished, I needed to know. I silently prayed that he would say yes, even though part of me knew the outcome wasn't great. I still prayed and hoped. The next two minutes seemed to drag on and on, until my phone lit up again.

_From: Kevin J._

_I don't know, we could try, but I'm not _

_Promising anything._

And that was enough, I pressed reply.

_To: Kevin J._

_I know, I'm just glad you're giving it a shot._

_Out of curiosity, what are you doing up so early?_

This time, it only took him a second to reply.

_From: Kevin J._

_Couldn't sleep, my heart wouldn't let me until_

_I fixed things with you. _

_But, I know you need your rest, so get some sleep._

_I'll talk to you tomorrow, I promise._

_Goodnight._

I smiled slightly and put my phone on the floor. He really did care, and I guess since he didn't ask why I was up so late he already knew. So things were okay between Kevin and I, which may be the reason why I feel asleep with a small smile on my face.

My heart didn't ache so much, it was still enough to hurt, though. My chest didn't feel so hollow, and I felt like I found a part of me again.

Still not complete, but enough for now.

**------------------**

**Hmm, I don't really think this is my best, but it needed to happen, you know?**

**R&R!**

**&&&&&&&**

**I'll post one more chapter tonight, I'm spoiling you guys.**

**:D**


	5. The distraction

**Alright, this one should be a little better.**

**KNOW WHY?!:D**

**Of course you don't which is why you guys are gonna read it…right, right, right?**

**-----------------------**

**Worth it.**

I was currently sitting on my bed with my finger hovering over the send button. I was starting to think I've been in this position before, which I was, two nights ago. Somehow, I found a little courage and pressed send, bringing the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" He said into the phone.

"Hey…it's Miley," I whispered.

"Oh, Hey how are you doing," I couldn't tell if he was mad or upset….but I knew it was awkward.

"I'm hanging in there," I laughed slightly, "How are you doing Kevin?"

"I'm good, busy, you know the usual stuff," he chuckled.

"_KEVIN! Come on! We gotta rehearse!"_

I stiffened.

"_I'll be right there Nick!" _

He groaned, "Sorry about that."

I knew he wasn't talking about the interruption, he was talking about how I had to hear _his _voice again.

"Um..yeah…it's cool," my voice started cracking, I knew it was only a matter of time before I broke down again, "I'll talk to you later okay."

"Sure, and Miley?"

"Yeah?"

"He meant it when he said Stay strong."

"I know, bye Kevin," I whispered into the phone, tears already falling.

"Goodbye, Miley," I quickly hung up and buried my face into my pillow. This was to be expected, after all, they are brothers. I just didn't know that hearing his voice for the first time in ages over the phone would hurt this bad. My chest was aching again, my head was screaming for an escape, every part of me wanted relief. This wasn't suppose to hurt so bad, I had Kevin back, so why did I feel like I was in even more pain?

_You have one, but not all three._

I answered myself. It was true, I had one, but I felt like it wasn't enough. Sure it was for that one night, maybe because I thought everything would be okay between _all _of us in the morning. But of course that wouldn't happen. This wasn't a fairytale.

I tried to think of happier things, like how sometime today I get to talk to Kevin again. I thought about what we would talk about. We needed to catch up that was for sure.

I wondered what he's been up to, if he was dating anyone, how the Burning up tour went, all types of things.

But of course, I was just distracting myself, and distractions don't last forever.

"_I __am confident But I still have my moments Baby, that's just me I'm not a supermodel I still eat McDonald's Baby, that's just me."_

I quickly looked at the caller id.

_Incoming call: Kevin J._

"Hello?"

"Hey, Miles, I'm about to go on stage but I was just wondering if you wanted to go to lunch tomorrow, you know catch up?"

I smiled, "Of course."

"Alright, meet me at pinkberry around two, sound good?"

"Yeah, sounds good."

"Cool, I have to go now, bye!"

"Good luck! Bye," I hung up and stared at the ceiling.

Maybe things were starting to fall in place, maybe….things will return to how they use to be.

**--------------------**

**I dedicate this chapter too Mileyfan No.1**

**I LOVE SPOILING YOU GUYS! **

**:D**

**SNEAK PEAK?!**

_I walked through the familiar doors, it's been forever since I've been here. Glancing around I saw Kevin. He smiled and motioned me over. I smiled a little and swiftly walked over to him._

"_Hey, Kevi-" I stopped in my tracks when I saw who was next to him._


End file.
